Nights like this... I I wish...raindrops would fa a a a aalll...
No, seriously though. I've gotten accustomed to spending my nights sans a bed partner... It gets easier as time goes by, but some nights you just wish you had somebody there to fill the space. Sadly, tonight is one of those nights.
So here I lay watching this poker tournament (more like its watching me) and looking at the wall contemplating the world. Where did I go wrong? Who did I piss off for this to be my life? Where is my forever after?
If I have retained any lessons in life I've learned not to question God and to always listen to my gut THE FIRST TIME! And by knowing these things I know not to second guess myself which is why a conversation I had earlier kind of shook me up a bit. Pissed me off even, yes PISSED, but only for a moment because soon realized it was not worth my energy to be upset any longer.
I was told tonight that I am crazy for not taking up an offer from a past flame to "be a family". Am I? I know not. I was also told that I'm "fucked up" for not giving said past flame yet a third chance to have my heart and that I am holding the past over his head. RIGHT! I mean, okay...maybe you DID change kudos to you...too little too late!
I mean, I appreciate the effort, but now that I have THRICE declined your offer could you please keep it moving? Like, seriously!
I understand that if you are truly sincere in your efforts my rejection may sting a little, but you WILL NOT be MAD at me and go off on a rampage of what a stupid, fucked up person I'm being for, politely even, telling you that I am not interested!
No, sir. You will NOT!
I will not be subjected to your verbal thrashings because you feel wronged that I no longer have the same feelings for you as I did before! Things change. The time for anger has long passed... The time for forward motion is upon us and I wish you would do just that...MOVE THE FUCK ON!
You say you've changed but for the past two years you've done nothing but show me the same old you! And to be frank I don't really like you all that much.
Wow, that just took in a whole different direction than where I intended. I just had to get that off my chest...Thanks for reading...stay tuned for more Sunshiney posts... I promise, they are coming!
No, seriously though. I've gotten accustomed to spending my nights sans a bed partner... It gets easier as time goes by, but some nights you just wish you had somebody there to fill the space. Sadly, tonight is one of those nights.
So here I lay watching this poker tournament (more like its watching me) and looking at the wall contemplating the world. Where did I go wrong? Who did I piss off for this to be my life? Where is my forever after?
If I have retained any lessons in life I've learned not to question God and to always listen to my gut THE FIRST TIME! And by knowing these things I know not to second guess myself which is why a conversation I had earlier kind of shook me up a bit. Pissed me off even, yes PISSED, but only for a moment because soon realized it was not worth my energy to be upset any longer.
I was told tonight that I am crazy for not taking up an offer from a past flame to "be a family". Am I? I know not. I was also told that I'm "fucked up" for not giving said past flame yet a third chance to have my heart and that I am holding the past over his head. RIGHT! I mean, okay...maybe you DID change kudos to you...too little too late!
I mean, I appreciate the effort, but now that I have THRICE declined your offer could you please keep it moving? Like, seriously!
I understand that if you are truly sincere in your efforts my rejection may sting a little, but you WILL NOT be MAD at me and go off on a rampage of what a stupid, fucked up person I'm being for, politely even, telling you that I am not interested!
No, sir. You will NOT!
I will not be subjected to your verbal thrashings because you feel wronged that I no longer have the same feelings for you as I did before! Things change. The time for anger has long passed... The time for forward motion is upon us and I wish you would do just that...MOVE THE FUCK ON!
You say you've changed but for the past two years you've done nothing but show me the same old you! And to be frank I don't really like you all that much.
Wow, that just took in a whole different direction than where I intended. I just had to get that off my chest...Thanks for reading...stay tuned for more Sunshiney posts... I promise, they are coming!
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THANKS!!!